I was reading Our Debt Blog today, and he linked to a website that flamed him totally. ”Hilarious!” he said. And it was. As I read back posts of this guy’s blog – namely the Financial Retards of the Month – I cried laughing at his posts about The Simple Dollar. I was in tears, dying of laughter. I mean, he counted up the number of times “frugality” was written in The Simple Dollar and compared that to the number of times “and” was written in the Bible. Ridiculously funny. Then I got to the February one.
Holy shit. It was me.
It’s the first time (that I know of) that I’ve been totally and completely flamed…and I can’t say I don’t deserve it. I’ve been an asshole, really, a boring, complaining, self-centered asshole. I mean, I remind myself of FB posts I hate of people who just complain about their lives…over and over and over again.
WTF is wrong with me?
I was stunned into silence – and I really wanted to email the author and tell him what facts he had gotten wrong about me (there were a few) – and decided to confront the fact that this blog turned into something I hated. I mean, when I began it, it was to document the reasons why life was great so we wouldn’t forget it. What it turned into was a fucking bitchfest! This is why I haven’t posted in a while – because I feel like a fraud when I do. I don’t live on an island in the middle of the sea, this blog isn’t about what makes living on an island in the middle of the sea worth it, and I’m in a totally different place than when I started.
I don’t like being that bitch who complains. Also, I realize (from reading the post) that people may think that not only am I a bitch who complains, I am living on government food stamps while enjoying my organic groceries and eating them too (untrue, have never been on food stamps). No wonder I was flamed. And no wonder I read through what I’ve written and cringe in…wtf is wrong with me?
I appreciate the support from anonymous people all over the place, but I’m considering taking this site down. Am I letting the haters win? No, I’m wondering if I want the reminder of a pretty low point in my life. I wanted this blog to be about all the good of Hawaii – that was the original intention. I don’t even live there anymore. Should I rename it “Simple Continent Living”?
So, I feel like an asshole, I’ve been flamed on the internet, and I’m wondering where the person I thought I was went, and when I was replaced with spoiled bitchy-McBitcherson.
On the plus side, I’ve finally got a job offer. Only took 7 months…though I was pregnant for 5 of those.
Thanks for your support peeps. And the blog I’m flamed on is funny, although it’s not so funny when it’s you being flamed.
Don’t take your site down. Even when I don’t agree with you, you have the guts to write honestly — not just about your actions, but WHY you and your husband make your decisions.
This takes courage. I admire courage. So do a lot of other people.
No, I wouldn’t have made some of your decisions. But that difference is what intrigues me…and you write beautifully about it. (Ok, except for this post — I’m not too thrilled about vulgarity, even if you are frustrated.)
Congratulations on your job offer. Which one did you decide on? Just slam the door on this guy’s post (no doubt, he is congratulating himself on what a clever boy he is – the creep), turn your back on it…and go on. For us, as well as yourself and your family.
P.S. I don’t care WHAT you call the blog…change the name, if you like. Just so I can subscribe!
Thank you Cindy. I appreciate the comment, as well as the positive input. The most interesting blogs are the ones that show a path – however faulty – toward something…and we’re going toward something! I guess inadvertently I’m documenting a path towards that something…it wasn’t what I meant to do when I started out, but it’s what it has evolved to.
I promise I’ll cut down on the swearing. I feel funny when I do swear online, but yes, I was pretty freaked out. It’s an odd feeling being flamed!
I read the post you were in and several others. Most of the posts felt like a rant. The entire blog seem to revolve around tearing other bloggers down. I believe the blog completely missed the point of personal financial blogs.
I read personal financial blogs, not for the well-researched, dry, financial investment how-to, but for the personal stories. I want to read about your struggles, your accomplishments, your journey through life. I root for you to find that job, move back into your home. I hope someday I read your blog and it says “Everything is great, we are no longer struggling. Today I was able to help a woman in line at the store that needed $20 to cover groceries. I am happy to say we can afford it.”
I can go elsewhere to find out how to invest my money in CD’s, etc.
You’re totally right, those are the sites I enjoy reading too. I like seeing journeys, and I guess I didn’t quite realize that I’m in the middle of one – for all our faults and mistakes.
Ooh no, please don’t take the blog down. Your site is one of the few I look forward to updates on. One of the few I can really relate to. One of the few I actually comment on (I hate people who comment just for link backs). Your site has always had a more ‘real’ feel to it, than most of the PF blogs I’ve read.
While that site is kinda funny, I’d hate to be on it, probably one of my biggest fears as a blogger. I already have such an anxiety posting certain things, I can’t imagine I’d feel good about posting at all if I were the subject of “Financial Retard of the Month”, ouch. I’m not a fan of tearing down other bloggers, even when you disagree with them.
I think all the bitching is relevant to the situation and it’s never bothered me. Probably because I’m a bitcher too. I hope you continue to blog! The good and the bad. It’s a journey I’m interested in following.
Thanks Angella! I always love your comments, so thanks for them!